This video was a hard one to do. Not just because of all the filming, editing, and effort that usually goes into long-form content like this, but more of the emotional story behind it that kept pushing this video out weeks after weeks after weeks.
I was originally supposed to publish this video ranking all of the Star Wars movies at the tail end of 2019, around the same time when Rise of Skywalker came out. But for those that know me, I was dealing with a lot at the time that prevented this video’s release. For one thing, I lost my Grandmother, or “Ducky Schwartz,” to respiratory complications. I still miss her dearly, though I am glad she doesn’t have to go through this pandemic at the very least. I lost my best friend. And to top it all off, I got into a car accident that wrecked me financially.
The holiday season passed (quite possibly the worst one I’ve ever experienced). January rolled around and I just got back on my feet. I was ready to film this video albeit a month later, but at least I was making progress. Then at the end of my recording session, all of the video footage got corrupted and wasn’t usable. So I had to reset and film the whole thing all over again.
A string of health problems prevented filming until March, and then I finally had all of my video clips and was ready to import the footage. Only problem was, for some inexplicable reason, my computer wouldn’t download all of the video clips. I have no idea why. But I had to pull out my other computer and download the rest of the footage from there. Halfway through downloading, my computer crashed and wouldn’t turn back on. I was so emotionally exhausted and frustrated that I couldn’t contain myself. I had a meltdown and completely broke down in my living room. I just felt so powerless. After dealing with one traumatic incident after another, all I wanted to do was shoot and edit a damn video, just to get my mind off of things. But I couldn’t even do that.
I was eventually able to restart my computer and download the rest of the footage several days later, but by then I couldn’t care less. I was so emotionally drained from the experience that I just shut out my computer and put the project on the back burner, focusing instead on my work and mental and emotional health. These videos haven’t done a damn thing for me, I thought. Why would I waste any more of my time and effort on them?
Fast forward to April, where we’re in the heat of dealing with this pandemic. Finally locked into my room with my own thoughts, feelings, emotions, and videos, I finally found the strength to return to my project and finish what I started. Video editing is not easy, and for those that are unfamiliar, it typically takes an average of one hour to edit one minute of footage. So I decided to take my time and just bite off one piece at a time. Two weeks later, I finally realized my vision for my ranking of the Star Wars series.
And yet, technical mishaps would strike yet again and try to stop me one last time. I finalized my remaining graphics and was ready to export my video. Only one problem: my computer wouldn’t boot up. I tried everything that Apple support suggested, but despite exhausting all options, the computer remained inaccessible, making a weekend’s worth of editing completely pointless.
So I pivoted, fired up my other computer, edited the video from a backup, implemented the graphics, and finally published my video against all odds. Suck it, Apple. Your shoddy hardware couldn’t stop me from sharing my love of Star Wars.
Why am I sharing all of this? Because out of all the videos I’ve produced, this is the one I’m most proud of by far. Every conceivable obstacle was thrown into my path for this video, from personal to physical to technical. And despite all of those roadblocks, I was able to persevere and do what I love most: talk about movies.
I don’t know how much more I’ll resume video work after this. The experience has been so emotionally taxing on me that I question how much longer I want to do this, if I even want to keep doing this at all. I still want to publish roundups for the decade as well as the Oscars, though now I’m questioning whether I want to do those in alternative formats to avoid further stress and frustration.
But I’ll leave those questions for tomorrow. For now, I’m proud of what I’ve produced, and I’m proud I got to share my love of Star Wars and the movies with you once again.
Thank you all for continuing to support me and watch my videos. I genuinely appreciate it, and it has kept me going in these very difficult past few months.
Anyhow, enjoy my ranking of the Star Wars movies. Happy Star Wars Day, and of course, May The Fourth Be With You.
– David Dunn